Alright this one is for those in doubt of my travel hipster credentials! You weren’t expecting Ambohimanga to top a list of dream places in Madagascar to visit were you? You were expecting like, the lemur equivalent to the Justice League headquarters where they organize resolutions to combat ongoing fossa-led terrorism driven by fringe fundamentalist groups within the fossa ranks and against the lemur community weren’t you? I know you! You were! But ya boi, on the hand of other, likes his travel with a side of culture and history, something that many a beta traveler forgets to consider when it comes to visiting Africa. Not me though! I’m lowkey like a sigma or whatevs!

The Royal Hill of Ambohimanga got on that coveted if not controversial UNESCO World Heritage List status in the big 2001 but its history dates back to long long before my dating history was as tragic as it currently is. I mean like multiple times older than my life time levels of old head activity. See, the royal in the title didn’t just pop out and flip us the bird like a cuckoo clock. Ambohimanga contains a royal city as well as the burial sites for the most gloriest of the former Merina Kingdom which once dominated the island.

It’s as sacred as the most high and naturally doesn’t lack in elevation neither, sitting on one of the 12 Sacred Hills of Imerina. All that lore might be foreign to the average reader (and writer) of this blog but hey, that’s half the fun, hey? Visiting places where you gotta learn some stuff too!

Ambohimanga is perhaps one of the most unifying places in Madagascar. Representing national identity, and diversity at once. Showing off spirituality, tradition whilst never quitting its full time job of being a beacon for Malagasy unity either. Spoiler alert for plus tard (Madagascar used to be a Frenchie colony back in the olden days) but Antananarivo is also on this list and Ambohimanga is only like not very far from there. Like a distance probably? Should I know it – probably? What I probably do for sure know, unless I don’t, is that Ambohimanga offers some deep cultural and historical insight in a nation mostly associated with nature and wildlife.

Life is wild huh? So if this wild life takes me on the ride I want to Madagascar and I end up posted up at Ambohimanga, I’m for sure planning a visit to the Royal Pavilions, Fidasiana-Bevato and the Mahandrihono Palace while I am there. Just to name some sights within the sight.

The Tsingy de Bemaraha is like the “best places in Madagascar” for me. But I’m such an edgy boy that I didn’t even put it first on here. I’m so edgy, I had to propose holy matrimony to the sheer majesty of edge to be seen at this sight, no Christian. Just look at this National Park, more like Supernatural Park, nah mean? Or like UNESCO Mars Heritage Site nah mean? That is to say it looks otherworldly and that frankly rocks to me.

Picture yourself scaling one of the long hanging bridges, walking across it cautiously like it was a tightrope, trying not to look down at the drop. You’re on edge waiting to see if God will drop the curveball we call bridge breaking and send you crashing down to your untimely (or maybe timely. I don’t know your life) demise. That’s right, if you come here you could die if you’re not careful. In my book, that’s the definition of a destination demanding of future travel consideration. That might also be why no one buys my book.

The Place where one cannot walk barefoot – Definition of the word “Tsingy” in Malagasy

However, don’t just be out there judging books by their covers. Cuz I know damn sure I won’t. Tsingy de Bemaraha is not just an advocate/ graduate of the school of hard rocks. It’s packing in literal forest-worths of mangroves that ya man Grove would grow crazy for, man. Plus the national icons whose tails are at least my biracial brothers – lemurs. That’s right, this is the Madagascar we were hoping for. Threats of death and lemurs!

Plus, it’s located in the Melaky Region and is 150 km from Morondova. Never say you don’t learn things from these posts…

I mentioned before this would be the grand spoiler all the kids on the playground or going gaga over. Yes, the Globe Junkie’s list of 5 places in Madagascar it’s author in chief would love to visit one day features the capital city of Antananarivo. I’m sorry to ruin the surprise. You know what else is a surprise though my guy? Something that’s also a surprise of course.

Okay, by that I mean Antananarivo, usually shortened to Tana, is often overlooked and desecrated verbally by ruffians who deride it as a chaotic, dirty and irrelevant city. However, that couldn’t be further from the truth. Okay maybe it could but still! Yeah it can be wild at times and rough around the edges at others but that’s part of what makes a visit here all the more rewarding!

See Antananarivo has historically been the principal city of Madagascar’s Merina people, who still make up the great city’s foremost ethnicity. Five centuries ago, Tana was set up by Merina king Andrianjaka under the name Analamanga, as the capital city of the kingdom. A century later, its name was changed by Merina king Andriamasinavalona to the current tonguetwister, which means “City of the Thousand”. That history lesson isn’t in here just for your headtop, one of the major sights is the iconic Rova, or fortified palace established by the aforementioned rulers.

But ya boi isn’t only tryna descend upon Tana solely for a glimpse at the past. The city’s got a bunch of other sights like Lake Anosy, a centrally located artificially-created lake surrounded by beautiful jacaranda flowers. Beyond that, I would give a shot at getting my capitalist on by perousing through the dense streets ot the grand Zoma Market.

Probably one of the most picturesque and iconic places in Madagascar, l’Allée des Baobabs is one of the premier destinations that has me crushing on countries like Madagascar in the first place. Travel means experiencing sights that make your eyes bulge and tongue do the matrix and that’s exactly what I’d expect to undergo on a promenade underneath the baobabs. It’s one of the most photogenic places in Madagascar and possibly all of Africa. You expect me to turn that down?

Laid out like a red carpet for an aura farming traveler such as myself, l’Allée des Baobabs (or Avenue of the Baobabs in English) sits out on unpaved and rugged roads in the Western Menabe region of Madagascar. The grove of trees covers an 850 ft stretch of road surrounding said path. Me, unable to be bothered when it comes to remembering measurements, will just say 850 ft is clearly the length of Earth’s circumfrence and leave it at that. Don’t fact check me. Just trust me bro.

You know what else I’d trust? You guessed it, the nearby Baobab Amoureux, or Baobabs in love. They’re so named because it appears to be two trees intertwined in some hot, passionate NSFW activities. If you’re a cultured traveller like me, you’ve also always been itching to see trees go at it and are dead set on exploring your voyeurist fantasies against the rustic backdrop of the Malagasy countryside.

This is what I meant when I said everyone is guilty of crushing on countries. You can’t honestly tell me that you’ve never thought these things my guy. You can lie to them but not to me! Or to the lemurs! They’re there too as well, like kinda. Idk. It’s lemurs. It’s Madagascar. You know the drill. Let’s move on.

The Parc National Isalo is the most giving gift of Mother Nature on this esteemed list of the top places in Madagascar that I am trying to travel to and would commit war crimes to visit! It’s located in the province of Fianarantsoa in the Ihorombe region for you political division buffs out there. This land has historically been used by nomadic peoples to farm the local and distinct Zebu cattle. Have you ever even seen thse things my guy? They = weird looking!

Lemurs be lurking in these parts too but enough about the animals. If I’m coming to Parc National Isalo, I am coming from the main attraction, aka the land itself. It’s rich, it’s colorful, it’s awe-inspiring in its grandeur and vastness. Dry forests and subhumid forests conspire to show off around giant protruding rock formations, akin to areas in the Southwest USA.

For me and most other tourists to Isalo, you wanna spend your time hiking, visiting the aforementioned geological marvels and diving into the many swimming spots to help against the often blazing heat outside. That’s right it could hot here, like very hot. Like hotter than the rhyme I put at the beginning with the name Madagascar. Even hotter than these blog posts some would say. I wouldn’t.

A guide is often required, and this place, like many places in Madagascar, is threatened. This time by wild fires. Happens to the best of us, doesn’t it? What can you do? Well, a lot of these are illegal man-made illegal fires, so you could try to stop it I guess. If you see someone doing that foolishness, just like put them on time out or something. Save Isalo. Trust me preserving spots like these will not only help our travel dreams but keep countries like Madagascar as inherently crushable as they currently are.